Praying it is a marriage.

There are no secrets in this eternal merging

Unfolding before our eyes.

Only when the serendipitous touch of Moon and the Sun

Merges in the infinity of a ninety-second, eternal kiss~

We stand here,

agape- dazzled

beneath our very galactic eyes,

Presented with a rare, golden-dark opportunity.

To realize: the Sun’s blindness can gift us sight.

The dark mouth of mystery can swallow us whole

In less than a yawned greeting to the day.

In this utter, dark rearrangement of things~

The collapse of all that was ~

Nothing remains intact.

Yet only by emerging through darkness

Do we truly appreciate the light.

So let me stare,

To all I’m told will burn me,

With a gaze naked and unarmored,

Into the swallowing cosmos I prayed would never betray me.

Let my sheer arrogance

be unspotted by dark fingerprints

On pale arms, on the softness of skin~

A ripened innocence

In the deep embrace of the Black Madonna,

Who knows the very first sound of laughter,

Who knows that light passes through her very iris,

Promising eternity in the blink of an eye.

and a poem from a couple of years back

CREATOR’S BLINK

Here I am

Rooted still~

Eyes gazing

the eclipse,

legs trembling

at this celestial merging

The warning thrums

In my veins

as I choose to stare

Into what I’m told

Will burn me.

Here ,

Ferociously still,

I Embrace

The sky’s blinked eye,

a pupil dilated

allowing the light

To seep in .

I worship the letting .

This dark

That engulfs me whole.

I offer me up

To you.

Entraining to the silence

Of starlings

who hush in awe,

Even the wind bows

his head

at the dance of the giants.

Waiting in agony

for this ring of fire

The hole - as whole

the cosmic eye of Grace

Light is slowly dripping

down my throat,

My legs once trembling

Now root into the

Earth’s dark marrow

as the softness

Of my body .

The light is found

In the act of swallowing

and

my total undoing

May the offer a yielding of a totality as whole as an eclipse

Read more

Yet, in clinical practice and deep inner work, we find a starkly different reality: the body is not a machine to be fixed; it is an altar of translation. I have seen it in my body again and again.

As the brilliant Jungian analyst Marion Woodman taught us through her pioneering work on psyche and soma, the modern soul is starving because it has been cut off from the Feminine Principle; the deep, unhurried wisdom of the earth, the instincts, and the physical form. Marion famously wrote that when the spirit is ignored or when we drive ourselves relentlessly toward patriarchal ideals of perfection, our unconscious femininity rebels and manifests in somatic form.

Pain is not an accident then from this lens, its not even pathology. its a deviation, a mirrored friction, a misalignment and , ultimately, a deep expression of our Soul

It is a whisper from the Soul trying to land in the matter of the flesh.

DO WE LISTEN ?

The Alchemical Vessel: Becoming a “Hollow Bone”

When a client walks into the therapy room carrying severe, unnameable physical pain, they do not need another technician. They need a vessel. I been bemused lately again when my husband asked me to massage his twisted ligament, or muscle on his frozen shoulder… He doesn’t know, because he is not that open to it, to know consciously, but i do hold the knowing, that the power of my love will heal his pain. This isnt a personal achievement. Not at all. But it is a somatic conviction.

And so it was. He has had this a few times now, and i been listening to his body closely, following my intuition to touch in places that soul energy was trapped.

This seems to have been a natural healing gift i always had but never made anything of it. some things aren’t to be disturbed.

I want to mention this because so much is stored in our fascia, our muscles, and also our subtle bodies.

In my work i work with as much intuitive clarity i have, across all of these energetic fields… In my work ,and conversations with friends im astutely intrigued and attuned to how or what the body carries on our behalf, and on mother Earth’s behalf…

Recently I got vertigo, and it was astonishing to notice my soul writing me in poetic verses in the midst of the WILD swirl…

can you imagine our power collectively when we are able to root into creation, if when destruction outside of us arrives?

Well, its my life’s mission to show /point people they are already capable ofthis. What amuses me is how quickly chronic pain dissapears , when clients bring this in.

What ingredients are required for this ? Quiet a few….

If you are a Healing Practitioner then we must have a clear vessel, as much as this is possible, from any egoic tendencies and attachments to any outcome

To guide someone to the wisdom of their bodies the practitioner must embody what I call the hollowed honeyed vessel ; a state of precise, unshakeable neutrality and deep energetic integrity.

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As Woodman observed, “Matter is Spirit moving slowly enough to be seen.” It is indeed the case. I know this from my own direct experience… Soul Energy is SUN energy, and it can also burn us. So any resistance to this is WISDOM SPEAKING… This is a case of expanding our human vessel to HOLD the Heat of spirit energy, for transformation to occur, without any striving force or seeking it. It is a paradox.

When we sit across from a client in agony, our role is not to panic, fix, or force an outcome. It is to hold an anchored, resonant space that transmits a profound, visceral faith in their body’s intelligence. Faith does play a huge role… and therapists healers coaches oriented from a more solution focused approaches have issues with staying with process..

This requires astute precision. We must pierce through the clinical noise of the symptom and listen directly to the mythic, symbolic language the Soul is speaking through the tissue. Through the bones.Through the marrow.

Back Pain That Vanishes…

Consider what happens when we stop fighting the symptoms and actually listen.

I once sat across from a client carrying severe, debilitating back pain. Standard medical routes had offered no lasting relief .

Instead of managing the pain, we slowed down. We became curious about what what the Soul was whispering into the body structure. Underneath the physical agony was a lifetime of carrying an unlived weight; an ancestral, loyal armor that had kept them upright in a world that demanded perfection, at the total expense of their natural rhythm.

When we met that back pain with soul-level translation allowing the body to finally express what it had been forced to hold the physical reality shifted entirely. The armor melted because it was finally heard. The body let down its guard.

they are pain-free ever since. I see this so often with clients, including myself.

This may sound like magic and , ill name it .it IS.

IT only invites you to take faith in your own magic, and let it happen.

Moving Forward with sharpening your Skills as a Healing Space Holder

When we learn the language of the Soul, physical pain ceases to be an enemy to conquer. It becomes an initiation. Same applies to our emotional pain.

humans are terrified to feel Despair. Yet, there is something tremendously non-dual about Despair. MY dreamer gave me this in my sleep, i cant quite rememebr it now but it went something along the lines: Despair is the Grief of Separation in the Ancient Mother Spiral.

It invites us to ask: What is the body trying to tell us that the mind has refused to hear?

When we answer that call with a hollow bone and astute precision and faith, we call the spirit back into matter. We open and widen the canyons of the Heart to expand and feel more love.

a Short video below on AMS is different to conventional psychotherapy

I am considering putting forward a masterclass on how to identify, recognise and hear the whispers of Soul in a client’s story… If you are interested in this workshop let me know by filling the google form below. I will run it , if interest gathers.

This is for healing practitioners ready to step out of symptom management and into the architecture of Soul translation:

My work spans across over 18 years of being a humanistic psychotherapist, a supervisor , a trainer of therapists and supervisors of therapists. I have held more hours teaching people how to harness their listening skills. Life brought deep shifts in consciounsess which i now bridge in mywork as a presence centered psychothearpist.

Click here to register your interest for the upcoming Masterclasses for Therapists.

Creation delivers her universal elixir, served by the Beloved on the table of our inner hearts. We are invited to sip. To feel the freshness of her ever-unfolding stream, flowing down like a quenching juice whatever our lips are thirsty for.

We are invited to anchor, to soften, to distill the meanings held in this carrying. Like the minerals we long for in our bones to keep us alive. Rejuvenated. Replenished.

Oh, how our bodies crave this. We have been depleted for eons! 

I have been sitting so much lately. Chop wood, carry water. Receiving the juice of my inner chalice. 

I meet the depths seeking to meet me back. Each time the spiral moves me downward, I free-fall deeper into my matter-body. 

Staying anchored in the quiet rhythm of family was a must. I was asked to go inward, in silence, because there was new medicine to receive.

In sleep, my dreamweaver throws me a rope. Recently, I asked for a name the name of my new mythopowtic identity and after guidance of my soul mentor. It arrived instantly over 2 nights. A name of origin in a tongue I do not speak. It came. Now, he responds to my waking dilemmas in this foreign language. It is a strange, beautiful thing to be in such reciprocity and dialogue. 

My only duty is to keep getting quieter. Still. Attuned to the inner ear of the heart.

No rushing to interpret the dream. No leaping into action. My ego finds this hard, but the soul has taken root in my bones now. She won’t let me hasten back into old patterns. Any misalignment feels like a sharp resistance in my very blood. Knives in my arteries . 

“This is how we expand the vessel,” a voice whispers.

It is intense. The alignment we are asked to hold grows stricter. As our vessel expands, it must also crack. And so it must, to hold a deeper, cleaner water.

We are not trying to purify the wild waters we swim in. We are just strengthening our muscles to swim alongside one another. Our vessel is simply this: the body, in alignment with the soul.

The Spectrum of Surrenderasks: 

Can we stay expanded here? Present? Anchored? Can we follow the breadcrumbs we are gifted, in surrender?

Surrender is a spectrum. I told a friend lately. 

How deeply we let go depends on so much. Our history, our exhaustion, our safety. I shared my work with a conventional audience recently. Some loved it; some did not. It is always this way.

The unfolding spiral work is a sifting process. It is SO alive! I’m called to see where the weeds and rotten seeds clear out. 

Something deep inside us always knows how to move, or when to stay still. How to sing, or how to sink.This is the embodied life of surrender. Aren't we always surrendering, even when we don't realize it?

We walk, and in our walking, we expand the womb of our creative fire. A child cannot be birthed in a rush. A foetus doesn’t birth upon adrenaline (it’s a whole other story that babies do!) 

There is a slow, heavy timing to this unfurling. For a restless soul, this is a hard lesson to learn. Divine perfection! 

It is the same for all we do. The quiet shift in a client cannot be forced. The emergence of our child cannot be rushed. We are continuously met by our shadows, called to sit, to digest, to discern.

My work, Ancient Mother, has been born. I am in the tender, heavy days of the postpartum. I am called to incubate, though I do not know what comes next. The linear mind demands strategies and visions. But that is not my way. It is simply not my gig. 

My way is to move and be moved by Wu Wei the quiet flow of things, remaining open to the mystery. 

mystery.

This brings me back to the somatic wisdom of Jungian analyst Marion Woodman. In her book, The Pregnant Virgin: A Process of Psychological Transformation, she speaks of this exact state of holy incubation. 

Woodman describes the "virgin" not as a physical state, but as the part of the feminine psyche that belongs solely to herself the one who goes into the darkness to bring her own silver out… her gold. The philosopher’s stone.

Ancient Mother Spiral is a philosopher’s stone - perhaps- and as such belongs upon itself… 

But is being enriched by so many writings especially of Marion’s Joanna Macy’s Bill Plotkin’s work , Stephen Jenkins’s ‘s work , Minoan writings and goddess studies and indigenous wisdom I’m only dipping my fingers in, what my body already knows… 

In the Anciwnt Mother Spiral this state of “Virgin” is communicated in various ways ;

through the “Euphoric Body” which when it awakens it lives of the alive life force inherent in our cells. Energy suppressed due to trauma.

the “somatic placenta” a state of oneness with the world ( Holy Union rite of passage 8) and the Honeyed Heart ❤️ which s the magnetic pull backwards and inwards the language of our soul in the emanation of its sweetness .

Home seeking home..

How it is being offered so far ?

There will be groups for mothers, and deep, quiet journeys for individuals. Find more on this below .

But otherwise, I am simply sitting. And in the sitting, I am being shifted from the inside out. Or rather emptied ! And godness me there s depths and depths of debris, cacophony of stories still echoing in my distant heart chambers . Homing them all. 

Gathering MY BONES! 

In a recent moment of tightness, that sweet scent of flower essence returned, just as it did during my descent to soul where I smelt jasmine, as if a flowered essence from a church temple. I am grateful I no longer feel the urge to label it or box it in an shape or form of meaning . 

I prayed to Joanna Macy, whose spirit held the birth of this work.

I wept and asked for a sign from her , just to know I was held in faith from the beyond.

I opened her book, The Inextinguishable Flame, by Rashani Rea ( offered at 20% discount by Rashani!) and the sweet smell bloomed again. My mind wants to explain it, but I refuse to cage the moment. 

Maybe it was the scent of my own heart.? The eternal dreams in me says it the collective blossoming of us all.

We never truly know, and that is our deepest blessing.

Later that day, a butterfly flew into the garden.

“Mama, I accidentally clipped the butterfly's wings,” my eldest son said, his voice small.

I turned to look. There she was, hopping on the grass, shape-shifting before our eyes. Was she a grasshopper now?

What is it like to feel the ground beneath your wings, little one? I wondered.

This was me. I, too, have felt my wings clipped lately. My body has been whispering for deeper nurturing, demanding to touch the earth. My soul has always known the butterfly 🦋 I even dreamed of them during the birth of my eldest. Spitting butterflies out of my mouth… 

(Art Lucy Campbell).

I thought I was there to heal him. But in the end, he healed me. He gifted me his song and me to you. It wasn't mine to hold anymore. It belonged to the wind. It always does.

He crawled onto my finger. Molecule to molecule.

A song emerged from my throat. We gazed at one another, and I fell into his eyes. I knew he was me.

We wandered through the house, singing. He stayed on my fingers  for five whole minutes ; or was it an eternity stretching its wings to hold us both?

Then, he took flight.

Inside of me, there was no single worry about whether he would fly or fall. No thoughts of healing or being healed. Just the moment, completely naked. Empty yet so so full.

And in his flight, he carries the prayer of our collective humanity. Her wings are also clipped. A suffering we have brought to ourselves SO we UNMAKE it.

I’m convinced it was that naked reality that brought the miracle forward . 

I proclaim that I am here for such miracles - are you?

THE RICH UNDERSEA

Sometimes,

You let go,

softening your polished edges,

and freely flow in the river of life.

Sometimes,

you are left with no choice but

to immerse your body

in its holy, cool waters

and let loose.

Like a pure baptism—

submerged in the salty waters of life,

until your flesh dissolves,

merging as a wave

into the vastness of your

inner ocean.

Let faith carry you to shores anew,

only to find that

the spaciousness you inhabit

was here all along,

running like a river of blood

through the temple of your body.

Here,

you are held by the hands of eternity,

and your holy flesh knows no limits,

nor actions nor non-actions,

as it comes to know itself

as the rich undersea

beneath your own two feet.

Poem from my book Honey and Ash: Mothers’s Alchemy of Burn and Bloom

found on Amazon

UPCOMING EVENTS CALENDAR

💫 FREE Ancient Mother Spiral Series Register Below ⬇️

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/ancientmotherspiralzoomseries

💫 Beyond Survival : A group for Mothers weaving the Ancient Mother Spiral

A 6 week container starting

💫 7 th September - ONLINE Mondays 3:00-4:30 pm ( open to other suggested times ! Fill form below)

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/womensacredcircle/beyond-survival-mother-alchemy

💫 for psychotherapists / healers

Caring for the Soul In Supervision

Next training in October or 11th October 2026 - 8 places available gave to face -

Co- facilitated with Masha Bennett

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/caring-for-the-soul-in-supervision

Book your place here ⬇️

https://buy.stripe.com/4gM28qaaxbQSbT0g6J57W03

BOOK HERE

Carl Jung once said: “What is most personal is most universal.” I always thought I understood what this meant. Until I truly, deeply... did.

For 9 months, I went through a profound journey of descent-ascent—a spiritual emergence in unity consciousness filled with deep mystical states, union with the Divine, Erotic ecstacy, I breathed and lived the Holy Union , the Sacred Inner Marriage.

What emerged from that fire was not just personal healing, but an evolving body of work: The Ancient Mother Spiral™ as I was revealed to the Interconnectedness that we ARE.

As an evolving body of work, I believe it has something potent to contribute to modern psychotherapy in new (yet ancient) ways. I don’t have all the answers. I don’t know where it leads. It is time for us as practitioners in the field of psychotherapy and humans on the whole to be entirely OK with Not Knowing.

Come to any of the 3 sessions, for as long or as little as you want for a tiny intro to the Spiral. We will have guided non-dual meditation, breath, movement Dance and a teaching on the Spiral as well as sharing as a WE

It is a tiny scratch on a massive Mountain, but it may just gift you the map your nervous system has been searching for…. What I love most about this is that as a Spiral it mirrors the Soul’s Individuation based on the Birthing {Process a woman’s body go through.

How obvious is this? Yet to arrive at What is, for all of us, we must die to what we are NOT. And i died a thousand Deaths in these 9 months…YET some part of me was revealed to be my true essence in it’s most ALIVE force than EVER.

What We Will Explore :

The Honey Drop Anchor (Somatic Integration) We track a new level of interoception the innate ability to sense internal safety. By dropping out of the linear mind, we explicitly trigger the vagus nerve to calm emotional hijacking and panic within minutes. My own state of consciousness, cultivated through deep contemplative absorption, will support you. We cannot lead people to places we haven’t traveled ourselves. It is that simple.

Ash Composting (Jungian Shadow Work) We step into the “Dark Goddess” stage: shadow integration. This is often the scariest part for the Western mind because we have lost our cultural containers for collapse and initiation. The Ancient Mother Spiral is the somatic container Marion Woodman spoke of needing. It aspires to deepen Marion’s work as it has answered the HOW of my purpose. And it is here to HOLD Women and Mothers and Humans to answer their own unique HOW to contribute to the world.

Together, we take the heavy baggage we carry individual, ancestral, cultural, collective; the chronic guilt, shame, resentment, and bitterness, and safely process it into rich fuel for boundaries and power. We learn to trust the wound. This takes time to embed, but we will navigate it safely.

The Skill of Surrender (Contemplative Science & Non-Duality) We train the mind to step out of hyper-vigilant control loops. This requires building a robust “witness muscle.” By integrating embodied non-dual awareness principles, you learn advanced self-regulation: how to stay grounded and spacious even when life is chaotic around you.

This is a safe, trauma-informed, and empowerment-centered space hosted by two seasoned psychotherapists who understand both the clinical mechanics of the mind and the mystical depth of the soul. (What a beautiful paradox it is to host this!).This body of work is actively shaping and unshaping me. I have never offered something more alive. Because this is a living, breathing framework, this series is entirely FREE. In return, I would love your raw, honest feedback to help shape it further. I am also keen to discuss potential collaborations, so please don’t hesitate to reach out.

I long for us to gather at the hearth of our presence together. Below is a pic made through support that life brought my way as a bi product of embodied surrender.

My work is FREE an i offer a lot of spaces that are very affordable.

But let me be clear, that I do NOT wish to invite extractive consciousness… This simply means I invite deep wide embodied conscoiusness, as much as you are able to embody at the time, rooted in the intention of the Deep Heart. There is no bad judgement here. This means, if my work inspires you it means the world to me to be given credit for this, to be acknowledged, not as a need but as an act of Reciprocity. I love the Spiral to caress, hold you and embrace you in your dark nights of your soul…

Share, tag, comment and most importantly COME.

REGISTRATION IS NOW OPEN. LINK BELOW.

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/ancientmotherspiralzoomseries

Pic below showing one of the core concepts in AMS the Somatic Placenta( i know i know too many concepts but its so much Fun!) we go into more in depth about this state of being in my Mother Groups, but some of my very initial thoughts are here

OTHER NEWS

I have finally printed my floor map-less map of the Spiral, through the ARt of Kirsti Danielle ready to begin Receiving Groups of 8-10 to experience the Spiral in a Group container. To express your interest for this you can do so HERE

🗓️ Upcoming Events Calendar

If you are looking to dive deeper into these spaces of supervision, alchemy, and stillness, I invite you to join me at one of my upcoming gatherings:

• Ancient Mother Spiral FREE Series. Come along and have micro Teaching and an Experiential co-journeying.

• September 7th (Mondays, 3:00 PM - 4:30 PM) | Beyond Survival An Online 6-Week Container for Mothers We will be weaving the Ancient Mother Spiral together. (Note: If you want to join but need a different time, please fill out the form to suggest alternatives!) 👉 Learn More & Register Here. Limited places

• Starting September | Face-to-Face 1-2-1 Deep Journeys Location: Sale UK, Immerse yourself in individual, deep face to face journeys within the Ancient Mother Spiral. 👉 Inquire directly for more details and availability.

• October 11th | Caring for the Soul in Supervision Location: Face-to-Face | 8 places available Co-facilitated with Masha Bennett, this training focuses on nurturing the energetic and soulful roots of supervision. 👉 Read More About the Training 👉 Book Your Place Direct via Stripe

With warmth and wholeness,

The Ancient Mother Spiral

I cradled around me my three children, and we all watched her birth…IT felt somethig of a paradise moment, my children’s attention truly focused with pristine clarity and knowing “yes this is how i came to the world”.

Some may disagree i have shown this to them… but hey ho.

What was so unique this time is that I was watching my own body’s crescendo power , and the wisdom it holds…

i cried.

again. at the magic beauty of the miracle we call life.

This time, I noticed the time her unbilical cord was being cut, at that point SHE cried SO hard…. the insight landed almost instataneously … There it is… the knowing…

the inherent knowing of the grief of seperation living in the ritual of the unbilical cord cutting..

I then traced back my memory if my other two children would cry and i seem to recall they did. It left me wonder if this is a universal phenomenon ….

The image lingered in my Soul. It felt like a brewing of a deeper well of insights ….

I know how to recognise this wonderful inner tug now, the pull that says…

stay here a little longer…dwell in here for some time, drink the anointing of unknowing, rest your inner mind in me and allow your human head to be stroked by ME….

PLACENTA….

I recall planting my first newborn’s one under a tree in our garden….

it felt just right… apparently a ritual indigenous traditions hold among Maori Aotearoa…the placenta * (whenua) is buried ceremonially… symbolising the child’s connection to the land and ancestry ( Fevra,2026).

We do NOT need to READ articles or peer reviewed papers to ARRIVE in this knowledge. MY BODY LED ME TO IT ALL …

Fast forward the insihgts kept coming, like stardust landing in my deepest parts of my Being…

“OF COURSE” Our placenta is our FIRST Mother….

sitting with this notion a little longer more came… the inherent knowing of our biological state that has the inherent capacity to feed life whilst filter all toxins!!!

WOW NOW that felt new…

Having spent a lifetime trying to remove the thorns that have armoured my human heart, the judgements, the trauma… the toxins we are constantly being bombarded with from all around us… OUCH

it hurt even more to notice we are born with this knowing, only to be abused outside of it from the dominator consciousness paradigm, AND …precisely to free fall in this GRIEF OF SEPARATION , from the moment we say YES to life.

It revelead to me , even deeper … that we are arriving on this planet SO we truly feel this Grief of separation…and THROUGH Which we return to our inherent knowing…

I begun seeing links to this and our soul’s journey of individuation…

Our soul’s knowing that we CAN return to BECOMING a SOMATIC PLACENTA

feeding all life…

Soma equates to Body in Greek… and having experienced unity consciousness for a length of time of 9 months, birthing my body of work, The Ancient Mother Spiral, i know too well , from lived embodied experience that THIS is our true state….The ART of Interbeing as Thich Nhat Hahn Said …..

that This is what Humans long for, and are thirsty for, that the illusion of individual Self is our deepest Sin, and suffering…

that we have confused Individualism with Individuation to quote ( Julie Schimdt)…

that we have simply…Forgotten….and we are here to

REMEMBER our Inherent WHOLENESS

And the Language is NOT only one we remember later in life , those lucky of us to have remembered it , and become it,

But also it is CARVED in the UTERO of our OWN WOMB .

In women’s BODY and SOMA

Somatic Placenta isn’t PURELY an Organ

It’s an Orientation to Life

It is our souls/ innermost Being’s tangible language that says

“Here , you re FED by the FIRST Mother, here I’ll sustain you to your wholesome existence through birth, and when your CORD gets cut , and you live life believing or forgetting this language of entanglement, returning to me will remind you the cord was never CUT”…

TO-DATE DEFINITION OF “SOMATIC PLACENTA”

Somatic Placenta is the cultivated psycho-biological , spiritual, cultural state of being to allow the “other” to be held in our first language of “entanglement”. It is an emotional energetic intrapscychic container holding therein an inherent knowing of how to feed life and how to remove toxins. The Emptying of our identity, in service to life.. Perhaps, it embodies, the definition of True Love ?

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If my work is meaningful to you and you wish to see this body of work evolving, please let me know, nudge me along..it means the world to me…. to fulfil this duty if i know it has impact… if I know I am part of the mycelium…

Having been gifted this amidst 3 kids I don’t find easy…I need the village to cheer me on… I simply do, and I now do , free of shame.

what salvation.

My precious placenta … which brought back the memory of my poem gifted to me in this Descent…. how wonderful to be making sense of our life backwards… and to bear witness that all knowing emerging was inherently lying in

THE SCISSORS OF YEARNING

You beg for the hands of magic,

to cut the cords that bind you

to your karmic samsara,

but you forgot,

the VERY cord that braided you in existence,

is the freedom that shapes you as flesh.

you ARE the scissors of your yearning,

the hands that slice

through illusionary lies

the need of the heart

that weaves the cosmos close,

let your galactic hands,

use the threads of pain

as the most majestic fabric

weaving you back

into your core knowing,

let the seamstress touch, work you gently,

loosening patterns

that hold you tight,

and as the knots unravel

your swirling dance

reveals in you, as thin and infinite

as the air of possibility

Poem from my Poetry book Honey & Ash: Mothers’ Alchemy of Burn and Bloom found on all Amazon stores- ALL profit goes to charity! Please support this cause

UK link found here : https://amzn.eu/d/03ze4M9i

https://www.crowdfunder.co.uk/p/supporting-jael-in-her-dream-to-become-a-nurse

UPCOMING EVENTS CALENDAR

30th June 2026:

the Alchemical Vessel: accessing the Deep Heart in Supervision

Book

https://onlinevents.co.uk/.../the-alchemical-vessel.../

12th July 10:00-14:00 pm

STILLNESS IN THE SPIRAL -£45

At Sand and Sound Centre ( face to face) Book

7 places available

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/stillness...

Beyond Survival : A group for Mothers weaving the Ancient Mother Spiral

A 6 week container starting

7 th September - ONLINE Mondays 3:00-4:30 pm ( open to other suggested times ! Fill form below)

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/.../beyond...

Face to Face 1-2-1 Deep Journeys in the Ancient Mother Spiral : in Sale starting in September - Inquire for More

Caring for the Soul In Supervision

Next training in October or 11th October 2026 - 8 places available

Co facilitated with Masha Bennett

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/caring-for...

Book your place here

https://buy.stripe.com/4gM28qaaxbQSbT0g6J57W03

Ancient Mother Spiral FREE Series Register Below

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/ancientmoth...

Linearity has broken us. It has tried to shape us mould us, arrange and re-arrange us in ways that are soul-destroying.

We are born into a world that wants to label us before we even breathe ;

A world that is dividing us into boxes and categories carving borders and defining us into a wild illusion of becoming …

A becoming held hostage on invisible wire lines , covering our mouths….. And we keep entertaining the fallacy of BREATH….

When the veils of our eyes begun to think, we have begun traversing time backwards resting deeper and deeper in our spirallic nature…

We shall not cease from exploration

And the end of all our exploring

Will be to arrive where we started

And know the place for the first time.”

This sums up my life’s story… and there are portals in our life that offer themselves to us, daily, moment to moment. It s just that we walk blindfolded, so we tolerate the Mystery….

You know when you look up the sun with naked eyes? You often get blinded seeking to cover your eyes with sunglasses….this is our human nature summed up….

But hte Sun is now scorching hot, in BOTH symbolic and radically true ways… Our Earth’s Soil is getting hotter.

Our waters are drying… our environment , our home…..HOME is crying….

Will you keep wearing your sunglasses on ?

I have written lots during my descend of 9 month to Soul, which returned me fully to the MOTHER In it’s true Definition….. And im giving myself over to this Dance…

To BRING the MOTHER back in the centre, to acknoweldge and appreciate the unseen labour all mothers have offered this world in milenia … makes me teary just saying this.

But how is Mothering going help us now ? And we re not all mothers so what ?

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It is associated with so much grief because we have forgotten that we’re whole before we “became “. In its true form mothering is not interested in partitions. It is a quiet rebellion to life , a garden that allows all seeds to root or not , and still keep watering them.

To mother, to me, means is to unlearn the language of separation.

To remember the archery of the Great Mother- the one who cradled you in your amniotic fluid , swimming in utero of galaxies …. .

Mothering is rooted in the intimate cultivation of presence. It is the somatic act of cradling a child’s fevered skull at 3 a.m.; when no- one is watching, finding lullabies in your exhausted marrow… This is the alchemy of care the alchemy a MOTHERING can offer : when we choose to hold what the world has labeled other, our palms become portals….

And it’s fucking HARD. The Hardest Job on Earth and the most rewarding…

Look how quick the linear mind steps in…i typed “job”... and i let it there to reveal the astonishingly colonised process… it is extremely hard because ALSO we treated it as a JOB vs blessing.

We saw it as a Role to Inhabit, Wear, like a jacket with thousands holes , passed down to us from generations, perhaps millenia of women before us and that we keep stitching up….

During my Burning…. I was revealed that to MOTHER is and never was a noun. It is a Verb, I have talked and write elsewhere about it…

And to make the process a bit more explicit, what htis means is a gentle or not so gentle gradual dissolution of an “I” wearing the “role of the Mother”. We find this Role becomes cumbersome in time, precisely because it is NOT ours to carry, perhaps because its loaded with ancestral trauma, beliefs in our bones that do not belong to us, illusions of martyrdom,

Identifications of being the Villain , because the shame we hold for shouting at our kids sometimes or “losing the shit” , is held in SILENCE, buried under the Soil ,.... Compensating for the explicit trauma and wounding our ancestors gifted us….

To excavate the TRUE meaning of MOTHER from the debris of the past, we must DIE…

Die to the roles we believed to be… and Rebirth to who we are. This is not an imemdiat overnight process, it takes gentle soft devotion. A reverence to hte unfolding. A finding of new places of faith in our bodies… to keep saying yes…. To keep abiding in our own process, THIS genuinely your way, can never be linearised, never boxed in any box nor framed in any idolic icons… it is yours and yours entirely… and if you are brave enough to descend where you are called…. You may return with gold , with NEW mothering hands to hold the world around you and your own children.

This is where life finds me. Emerging from a 9 month unity consciousness, I am now being weaved in threads and torn to pieces all at once. My poems published in Honey and Ash: Mothers’ Alchemy of Burn and Bloom held it all…

Mothering from this perspective can be a truly political act, but one that doesn’t look as you know politics. It is quiet, soft , rooting underneath the oppressive structures , growing like ivy at the roof top of our hearts . Our armored hearts , inviting them to soften a little more, to tenderdise, to get bruised in the schooling of Humility… to return to our eco nature , and hold servitude to humans, to give over ourselves at the feet of this world and know our own unique HOW….

It is the intentional practice of seeing the stranger’s hunger as our own, of recognizing that the same hormonal tides that shape my twilight dysphoria also swell in the oceans, pull at the grief of women nursing babies in bombed-out basements. This is not metaphor. It is the schism in our hearts . and we feel it but we keep walking pretending its not there.

Mothering in this way paves the way for Grief to hold her central dancing stage…

Gives way to our fuelling passion to dance us in a web of togetherness,

For how LONG will you keep believing in the story of your individual being ness?

When will you realise you are funghi, mycelium growing sideways… I want to Shout out for mothering and stand it alongside the so familiar . Othering!

Othering thrives in sterile rooms where bodies are sorted into binaries, where empathy is a scarce currency. It is the harsh cold logic that exiles us into categories, the sharp scissors that severing the umbilical cord that links my grieving heart to my child’s laughter,

Othering is the universal lie that has absolutely fractureed our shared humanity. It has to DIE. NOW. We don’t have to look far to see its symptoms. Othering (vs mothering ) reduces souls to data points, their worth measured by productivity, their pain dismissed.

In the lineage I come from mothering was known as the greatest service to the world through women becoming servants to their families , as best as they could, but silenced , not sharing their grief or tears . Not honoured . Martyrs of service.. Mother less mothers , not respected by motherless fathers . The wound is one.

To mother the way I perceive it , is to transmute silence into a language older than shame. It is the light we spark in the cellar of despair, lighting the way for the exiled, the misfits, the ones whose very existence rebuts normal. We mother the best when we turn kitchens into sanctuaries, when we rewrite laws with the ink of kinship, hearts uniting not colliding ,

when we sing lullabies to the parts of ourselves still shivering in the cold. In the old basements of our psyches ….we excavate the ordinary and turn it to become our altar. Truly this is impossible . This is the radical softness that terrifies empires: Mothering, in its feral grace, dissolves fences, and builds bridges. It demands sacred recklessness; to love without the armor of certainty, to let our edges blur until we no longer distinguish our heartbeat from the pain of the wounded world.

Mothering is a bit like weaving for me.

It weaves a web where every thread is vital. It acknowledges the intrinsic value of beings beyond labels. When we mother, we do not merely provide; uplift but we also create spaces where creativity especially and healing flow like rivers nurturing the land. The often dried land within. Each act of kindness becomes amother jewel in the cosmic necklace , waiting to be worn by our shared Humanity. This is what perhaps it means to be crowned again in the Mystery rites… We are all mothers and children in this sacred journey.

The Great Mother has taught me what it means to truly mother . To align with Her Wisdom, is to reject the scarcity that fuels othering. It is to leak light at the seams, to let our care be a contagion that undoes the disease of division.

The wound is the place where the Light enters you, Rumi wrote.Our collective mothering; raw, unapologetic, unbound by biology; can ignite a dawn where no one is left unheard?

I believe this is possible because i always loved miracles. And i have met many.

If there is one way that we will reclaim the political and return it to its birthright

That we reclaim our sovereignty is by is whispering, again and again, until all the illusionary walls of separation between us melt , like candle wax .

I am here. I am here. I am here.

It is a collective responsibility to becom midwives to a world being born.

THE FALACCY OF DIVINE MOTHERING

Shame is here to thaw. Full stop. We have hidden the deepest shadow aspects of Motherhood in the cupboard, and they leak out of our nails…. Ancient Mother Spiral is here to bring deeply holding love to the deepest darkest parts of your inner psyche.

The negativity can become vicious, and if we keep buying in the illusion we should be all nurturing…. because the very holding of it, perpetuates the Trauma FOR our Children!!!!

SHAME has been the NO 1 tool of Consumerist Society… PARENTING INDUSTRY HAS BEEN BUILT on this bone marrow Shame… count me how mayn thoushand books of “How to Parent are out there”…

THE WU WEI OF MOTHERING

To Mother From this place , is perhaps talking about moving from Holy Union in my Ancient Mother Spiral, my evolving body of work… where the forces within us are aligned and keep align-ing…for this we must master our consciousness and develop the Nervous System to cultivate a strong capacity for the Heat of transformation….

But know its possible.

To Mother in this way means to be mothered, by the inner Great Mother within, the dweller of dreams, the poeteess, the artist the visionary, the unseparating divinity that holds everyone at the centre of hear Hearth, and the devouring one. The Balancing of these two forces must aling in our Heart, so we MOTHER our World and not OTHER.

Bridging the lack of Village:

Is it time to return to what hunter gatherer societies knew always? to build the network around us to help our Mothering Journeys?I have coined the “circles of Reciprocity” Idea which is very simple : a connection of MOTHERS gather and create a circle… and for it to work we must have some criteria . It was astounding to me to discover to who i discussed this with that the

• Rule of Reciprocity means it s not a Transactional relating.

• Offer our service /time as the new currency to other mums who may need help with: folding clothes, babysitting, mirror buddying, especially useful for Neurodivergent mamas,

• exchange of other services as agreed per Group!

Ripple by Ripple we will reclaim our LOST VILLAGE

Id love to know where is your struggling point, what question emerges in you as a reader, mother, visionary ?

If my work resonates and Inspired something in you, let me know. I love to know how we ripple inspiration across a dying world.

FUTURE OFFERINGS & EVENTs

***30th June:

the Alchemical Vessel: accessing the Deep Heart in Supervision

Book

https://onlinevents.co.uk/.../the-alchemical-vessel.../

****12th July 10:00-14:00 pm FAce to Face Event :

STILLNESS IN THE SPIRAL -£45

At Sand and Sound Centre ( face to face) Book

7 places available

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/stillness...

______________________

*** Beyond Survival : A group for Mothers weaving the Ancient Mother Spiral

A 6 week container starting -7 th September - ONLINE Mondays 3:00-4:30 pm ( open to other suggested times ! Fill form below)

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/.../beyond...

*** Face to Face 1-2-1 Deep Journeys in the Ancient Mother Spiral :

in Northenden and Sale UK starting in September - Inquire for More

Caring for the Soul In Supervision

Next training in October or 11th October 2026 - 8 places available

Co facilitated with Masha Bennett

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/caring-for...

Book your place here

https://buy.stripe.com/4gM28qaaxbQSbT0g6J57W03

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His belly soft.;... must like  the soil moulds into wet sand, for little fingers to build suncastles with…

His keratin spines intact, holding onto the sharpness of survival to the last moment…

Holding my daughter;s hand as we were approaching him, each of our step felt like a tiny bow before his tiny body… 

“Look at him Iphianassa, look how beautiful he is- he is dead…”

My eyes begun welling up as I entered the temple of the vastness we re called to pay our respects for . 

Her little eyes transfixed onto him, blinking rapidly at the strange image unfolding before her eyes.. Moving fast in search of meaning ? or perhaps admiring his beauty…

Another mother and her boy passed through, the young lad lended his coat to lift him away from pavement made of sterile cement… an echo of humanity’s forgetting for survival

An act of rebellion to the clockocraucy of this lifetime….( a term gifted to me by Rashani Réa)

Kneeled down and stood around him; we admired Death… there is an immense  beauty Death holds… what a gracious encounter we were bestowed… 

Four strangers gathering around to put flowers around his body… we made him a little funeral song…

“Mum im sad, lift me…”my daughter said, knowing too well her little lungs were filling with the enormity of life bursting as tears at the edge of her blinking eyes.

“Beautiful my daughter, feeling sad is beautiful… “

“Look iphianassa he is going back to mama Earth, mama Earth brings us here and takes us away…she is everywhere” i whispered holding her in my arms, as we continued to walk towards the nursery…

Her big round blue eyes transfixed, locked into the liminality of life. 

Time stood STILL , and for some time i felt hedgehog’s little claws, were with us, cutting throug the veil…

“...and in the trees..”

“Yes iphianassa”

…”and in the sticks…

“AND in the sticks…”

“And in the sky….”

We kept walking but there was no one moving this time. I was everywhere . The dying in me the vastness of his spirit following my footsteps whispering “ bow here … and here …. And here ….” 

My daughter s hands wrapped around my neck felt as if it came the cosmos … humanity s hands clawing for love safety and belonging… 

I left her at the nursery in an altered state… as I type this I recognise 

How deep our forgetting is;….. to call DEATH liminality an altered state when it is the very fabric of our reality…veiling us from the immensity of our love 

Our hearts inner core once the keratins spines we have built over the years melt in us…

Walking back i was beggingfor my heart to break open wider still… holding in her love - the love death gifted me- 

the spikes within that have hardened from the cemented timeframe

Little friend, thank you for bringing me back to the moment in your stunning breathtaking way… 

May your spirit allow these words to travel through me 

Melting on their passing keratin spines of the reader s hearts 

A little more

If there is one thing I’m here to Sing is the Song of Death so we re learn how to truly Live …

The spiritual heritage we gift our children is underlying all that I’m here to offer and gift to the world…

🌍

Burning to the Question Of WHAT and HOW to be a human being is a necessity in our cemented lives … let us fall through the cracks of forgetting to be resurrected to our fierce Mother Earth Heart

To be made whole.

This Holy Hunger is Ancient …and it is here to be FULLY felt , trusted , revered and free fell into - if we are to be shown our dharmic purpose .

The deeper we surrender to it leads us to what I call in the Ancient Mother Spiral the first cry of our “ Grief of Separation” which eventually will lead us Home.

The umbilical cord was NEVER cut.

Akin to a baby whose cord is cut and the first sound of existence is our OWN cry

The Ancient Mother Spiral proposes that it is the utter embrace of this very cry that will Re-unite us with the Ancient Mother within and so without.

A poem that emerged after me and my daughter fell after the happy go round on the floor - and I was comforting her.

shortly after I felt the unity of the fall I moved to the bench to capture the magnificence of the ordinary moment.

THE UMBILICAL LIE

The sweetest grief

is the realization:

my children do not need

a mother.

They long for me to merge

with seaweed, grass, ant, oak root—

to map the depth of my mycelium,

green tendrils extending

where fingertips touch skin.

Mother’s got us, baby.

The mother holds us.”

Swing-dizziness roots a spell from beyond,

proving the only way up

is down.

The swirls of the playground

lock into iron chains and woodchips.

Touching your body, Earth,

I am transported—

an infant tracing skin,

seeking sanctuary.

Never separate.

Adorning the milk you gift

through my iris.

Iwas never meant to inherit the lie:

that the umbilical cord

was ever cut.

Never meant to become the adult

who forgot how to swirl on trampolines,

transforming into a canvas

of the deepest skies—

drawn in twine,

in rainbow.

My FUTURE OFFERINGS

💫 I am starting a #MyceliumMothering poetry project : the idea is so so simple: we gather in unity and we spread love verses to mothers and fathers across the globe- anonymously. If you re keen to be part of the steering team email me Maria.kefalogianni@gmail.com

UPCOMING EVENTS CALENDAR

💫 30th June:

the Alchemical Vessel: accessing the Deep Heart in Supervision

Book ⬇️

https://onlinevents.co.uk/event/the-alchemical-vessel-accessing-the-deep-heart-in-supervision/

💫 12th July 10:00-14:00 pm

STILLNESS IN THE SPIRAL -£45

At Sand and Sound Centre ( face to face) Book ⬇️ 8 places available

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/stillness-in-the-spiral

💫 Beyond Survival : A group for Mothers weaving the Ancient Mother Spiral

A 6 week container starting

7 th September - ONLINE Mondays 3:00-4:30 pm ( open to other suggested times ! Fill form below)

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/womensacredcircle/beyond-survival-mother-alchemy

💫 Face to Face 1-2-1 Deep Journeys in the Ancient Mother Spiral : in Sale starting in September - Inquire for More

💫 Caring for the Soul In Supervision

Next training in October or 11th October 2026 - 8 places available

Co facilitated with Masha Bennett

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/caring-for-the-soul-in-supervision

Book your place here ⬇️

https://buy.stripe.com/4gM28qaaxbQSbT0g6J57W03

Nothing luminous about it is ever expected of you.

Exploring your way to home is of course your own individual journey back to wholeness…

You are a free sovereign being to explore , to experiment and play in this cosmic playground we are let to roam free…. Isn’t that a wonderful invitation? A most majestic temptation to the play of Life ?

It raises the question for me where I currently am;

Would you like to eternally be playing or adult to the playground of SOIL ? Working actively with my waking dreams is very alert in me these days; the place where dream state and waking state are ONE…. because they are.

This of course is my current Inquiry and so i am offering the skipping rope to you ,here , to receive this blog as if an invitation for place from your soul back to YOU …

If I was to offer anything teachable to this blog; i couldn’t…

Being who I am, I move in Spirals, and so everything I am being, to doing ,moves in Spirals;

in a Swirling dervish kind of manner; Im inviting you to momentarily get ,conscioulsy lost, here with me…I wrote recently

in a world obsessed with finding…. wandering lost seems to be the one way i keep finding myself.

• Do YOU know where you are in each given moment ? Or do you mostly feel lost ?

There is no other way best for me to serve than offer you my unfinished dinner plate, my incomplete loop… here ,alive, transparently and in my most favored oblivion…

It’s been one of these mornings for me… I have so many tabs open of creative loops, half finished half completed, half tended and I noticed this loud noisy itch sprouting from deep within my psyche whispering but you must write about your forming School, or your forming chapters, about the Ancient Mother Spiral… you must tend to your group…

As if by writing something down, it captures it’s freedom as opposed to more likely jailing it, pinning pins in water…

But you see my story has been different, unique to me…

I always carried an irrational DREAD of feeling trapped , moulded, shaped by anything.

In my childhood my spirit was SO wild and untamed my family struggled a lot with. My brain wiring was tuned to other frequencies, melodies, and inaudible songs underneath the noise of modernity in the mix of patriarchical/matriarchical Crete, where I grew up.

I spent a lifetime wandering lost… as if i had absorbed the confused fusion between the land’s masculine-feminine archetypes ,as they travelled down generations from hundreds years ago , to my further ancestors and my biological ancestry and down to ME.

CRETE was rendered lost perhaps in history, deviating from a time of being where there was , historically speaking, a deeper balance between feminine and masculine archetypal energies.

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Perhaps i became a sounding tuning fork to a timeline that was seeking to remember itself through me…could it be this is what you too are ?

I am still unlearning the survival itchiness to arrive even somewhere… and paradoxically for me, writing me anchors me somewhere alively… in my flesh… as my soul has rendered free …

Being Audhd this requires REAL MASTERY of consciousness and mind, which means nothing more or less than allowing the tidal waves to pass through and be filtered by the field of the unified heart.
What I call The Honeyed Heart in my Ancient Mother Spiral.

For me this means championing the eternal loops that are open, the half formed chapters, the half written blogs, and re-framing them not as failures but as already ripened seeds not yet to bloomed in the passage of time.

Seeds I shall -with some almighty effort at times- refrain from forcing to bloom, but instead treat them as the ink that never vanishes … the seal already made…

My deep faith is what keeps these inner spiraling movements ALIVE,

the knowing they are here to be weaved in divine timing into a spiral i m forever called to be danced in and AS.

Are you ever meant to complete a Spiral in Motion ? or to be danced in it, in the most refined precise way unique to YOU ?

ICE CREAM INVITATION INQUIRY:

So lying in my hammock this morning grabbing an ice-cream was my body’s rebellious way to tend to this inner friction between DOING AND BEING….

I WAS ,paradoxically Gifted Insight…in the very eating of the very ice cream I consciously used as a vehicle to tend to my very sweet longing for being…

As I was relishing in it , becoming sweetness itself , I felt a quick sharp pain through my upper left long forming cavity on my teeth.

“Ouch….that hurt…”

Momentarily thankful for the sensations that my body is still here… I noticed how quickly I forgot about the pain and moved on to relishing this Ice cream..

Then the insight arrived on how this very process mimics the whole of creation!

( if you expect the unravelling of meaning to follow strictly after this sentence, then grab an ice-cream and melt with me…)

Do you want to eternally play or adult to the playground SOIL? Is what God asked inside of me lying in my Hammock.

It has of course being the Very alive Inquiry here lately…as I am emerging from my Dying wings… to LIFE…

When we inhabit and embody the Honeyed Heart , in my Ancient Mother Spiral is the embodiment of the Holy Union Rite of Passage, it marks a unified field that filters the tidal waves of mind and consciousness, and marinates as a sweet place able to hold the fire of opposites…

to be This Honeyed Heart means we don’t drown in the chaos… we sweeten the edges around it to hold it…and be held in it… and even more we TRUST and hold our full faith in IT… can anything sprout from chaos? Hell yes!!!

Conscious Femininity( holding embrace) requires a radical, grounded presence that it mirrors our active active choice to step out of the rushing, performing world and drop onto the “playground SOIL.

Licking an ice cream in a hammock might look like passive relaxation from the outside, but my experience was an act of high consciousness which , apparently, im called to make explicit and transparent for others to relish similarly in their lives.

Relishing in my Receiving Mode ( in this case the Ice Cream) which can also be seen as my Soul’s way to fully awaken the sensorial pleasure i derive through being, including the fleeting tooth pain i felt, - marks a significant shift for me in my Inner Masculine Rising Sun…

“The fear of receiving resonates in the deepest levels of the psyche. To receive is to let life happen, to open to grief and loss, to open to love and delight. Only when we experience trust in the Mother's love- through dreams or waking life- can we open the door to our own hearts and receive the universe.” Marion Woodman, a quote shared in the course im currently Receiving on Marion Woodman’s Lineage.

I believe that the Ancient Mother Spiral is the antidote to this frantic toxic masculine patriarchy has taught and conditioned me and us in…In my recurring experience I am meeting my divine inner masculine the deeper i anchor into my feminine consciousness…

“Wholeness, not perfection, is the peak “ Marion Woodman says…

LIGHT- SON

Your warm rising

feels like tendrils growing

in the cracked porosity

of my calloused vessel.

A lucent, yet enflamed love

wraps me in a radiance

that forgets its own name.

They call you Sun

but truly, you are my Son

tenaciously igniting

the light of creation.

Resting your gaze

in all the shadowed places

humans forget to look,

whispering, “Here. Look here,”

each day, and each night.

Pulsing, cyclical light

pointing us how to rise and set

And how you do not disappear

in your setting?….

but rather sink back

into my cradled arms.

Are you lifting your light up,

or is the Father opening wider?

Rise here, now.

Now is your time.

Welcome back, Son.

This is how I want us to greet the light

each time it dims:

without the ache of forgetting

that you will rise again.

My insights from my licking of the Ice Cream this morning are these:

• It was wonderful to notice zero dwelling on the actual pain but to notice instead that the very pain made the relishing even more enjoyable .

• The Middle Path is this: Allowing the sting to exist alongside the sweetness. The pain doesn’t ruin the ice cream; it acts as a stark, sharp frame that makes the cold, sweet cream taste even more vibrant. It proves us that we are alive, embodied, and dynamic ,...what? Spirals of course!

If we only accept the sweetness, we are floating above the earth. If we only accept the pain, we are buried under it. Accepting both is what turns the playground dirt into rich, fertile soil.

How to Relish Life through the Honeyed Heart

If we want to live from this unified field, we have to learn how to change our relationship with our own disruptions. What i call our own psychological contractions.

1. Collect Your “Open Tabs” as a Garden, Not a To-Do List to be completed ( rhymes with the awakening of the Honeyed Heart, rite passage 1 in the Spiral)

When the creative loops are spinning and you begin to feel the pressure to write or produce builds up, change the language. Grab an ice-cream!!! Those half-finished chapters they do not need to be captured to be free. They are living tendrils.Relishing life means trusting that the creative flow has its own seasons of wintering, flowering, and fruit-bearing.

2. Welcome the Somatic Interruptions ( rhymes with gestation, and descend rites of passage in the Spiral )

The next time a sharp metaphor or a sharp pain breaks your peace, notice how your consciounses move… Ask the sensation what insight its bringing you about your life… Sometimes, a sudden discomfort is just the body’s way of grounding us back into the present moment, reminding us that the physical vessel is a sensitive instrument meant to feel the full spectrum of our reality. Are you listening ?

3. Practice “Tasting the Sharpness” through the dying to it…( rhymes with the Holy Union rite of passage in the Spiral)

When enjoying something beautiful, consciously acknowledge the fragility of it. The intricate inextricable relationship it holds with death and dying… The fleeting nature of the experience -and LIFE on the whole - is the very thing that makes it sweet.

Help this work evolve by sharing your comments, questions, insights…

Frankly I’d rather lie in the hammock than keep feeding this work, and im aware it cant be fed without the HIVE …. To cross pollinate this inner Garden, this inner promise that “will kill me to break” as the poem of David Whyte says….

The Spiral is being tasted, savoured, by groups of people a we speak… and shaped by their experiences and voices…

Upcoming events to experience the Spiral and it’s potent energetic frequency that it carries are found below :

INVITATIONS TO THE SPIRAL PROCESS VILLAGE FORMING :

• CPD Stillness in the Spiral | PCP My First face to face Group Gathering to sit together and allow Mystery to walk through us- 8 places in total.

• My next Mother Alchemy Circle is coming in October , Register now for updates

• Caring for the Soul in Supervision in December- Registrations and bookings now open- limited places

• “Circles of Reciprocity” was born in the dark in my exhaustion as a mother with no village. The seed has now planted. Does it attract your interest? Email me and let me know…let’s see what we can cross pollinate together.

• Upcoming The Alchemical Vessel: Accessing the Deep Heart in Supervision on Online Events UK

• Upcoming RETREAT in CRETE - WAIT FOR NEW ANNOUNCEMENTS ON THIS ONE! IT IS STILL UNRAVELLING IN PROCESS AND BY LIFE AND WE RESPOND ACCORDINGLY.

All my offerings are Process Based…the emerge from the Mystery, and they are offered back into the Mystery…my deepest longing is to ripple Ancient Mother Spiral as SHE deserves to love and be loved…

If my work means something to you let me know… it is the FIRST time there is a what feels like Drive for Exodus from Patriarchical structures…this does NOT mean LEAVING….but it could perhaps even mean Staying BUT shifting the ontology from which we are moving. and This looks DIFFERENT to Each person.

The Ancient Mother Spiral is here to Weave this new “Sangha as a We”. It is both a terrifying prospect to me and alluring all at same time. I feel both the dread of this and the longing i cant quite grasp fully yet.

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So many humans I witness, are trapped in a most acute state of arrested, arrogant development stuck in a loud, narcissistic egocentric adolescence….There , I said it.

.We are witnessing the birth of the biggest cult in human history, shaped entirely in the dark.

The void of the SCREEN …. And not that many are talking about it … and we are sucked in it 24/7

I know it from myself on how HARD i must entertain at times my muscle of restraint to un-plug from it… it is tempting as i create all the time, i write I blog , poems…so i have made an association to creativity… we have dissapeared teli from our homes and my children couldnt be happier.

but where is the paper ? those parts of our brain that use our hands to ENGAGE with Life.

It feels that we are in the biggest cult of personality. We are all - caught in in one way or another -.

Bear with me as I trace this thread. We are currently drowning in a ferocious explosion of

“look at me, look at my life, look at my expertise, look at my talents and skills.” And where is this entire drama staging itself?

In a screen. A glowing, flat void… disengaged by community action, gathering, and watering the seeds of US…togetherness…

MY VISION

A year back, I stood at my kitchen , and I suddenly folded forward….

A razor-sharp pain entered my body, tearing right through my solar plexus, down through my gut, and driving straight into the earth. The pain lasted only a few seconds, but it struck like lightning….

I kept the inquiry alive in my bones, asking what that flash was. The answer that came back was astonishing, fast and clear, landing deep in my vessels:

“You were just gifted a bodily vision”.

“A bodily vision? I asked … what is it saying?”

“Your bodies will be consumed by the DARK void which is the SCREEN.”

This truth didn’t just speak to my own human vessel; it spoke to the collective body of humanity…

The realization continues to drop deeper into my bones, bringing with it a fierce, protective rage to extract this parasitic illness from our collective consciousness.

Look at what has happened to the healing industry. It has been completely swallowed by capitalism, relying entirely on follower counts, influencers, and watching people performatively sell their trauma and breakthroughs.

We don’t actually perform healing anymore; we are being groomed to talk about it in ways that are attractive, marketable, and highly consumable.

While there is a practical need to share our work, this ecosystem quickly becomes just another mask of performativity… another bit of information to CONSUME.

Frankly I find it disturbing .

And It is the VERY why i am longing to bring my my work outside of it in physical community.

I am also emerging from a wild Descend to Soul for the past 6 years… integrated and ripened. Not rushedd to performity.

Perhaps it’s my saturation point.

We are being stripped away from what it truly means to heal in real, messy community, thrown instead into an eternal samsara of competition, branding, and capitalist survival.

Communities are sprouting left, right, and center, but they are entirely dependent on an online presence…

While we likely need both worlds, something deep inside of me is in profound grief.

The Hungry Ghost inside the Bone

When I tune into this collective madness, looking beneath the contraction and into SOURCE; I discover that this is our inner hunger turned outward.

I recently attended a conference that presented Artificial Intelligence through a Jungian lens. It clicked:

AI is our own inner hungry child.

It is the externalization of the living ghosts inside our bones who want more, more, and more. And from this angle the facilitator continued - “ you d want to keep feeding conscious consciousness these machines when they will become indestructible” I felt i was transported in a memory of the future…

Something in me felt relief and another part of me alarmed in one breath. What a conundrum to be faced with !

This desperate, hungry, reaching thing claws at the digital world, demanding to be seen, to be special, to matter in a way that burns through everything else.

The longing and the terror to be seen and the longing to belong.

We call it narcissism, and on a human level, it is a beautiful, terrible distortion.

Beneath the noise, I hear the Holy Mother say in a sober, clean voice:

This is ME trying to show you how to love intensely.

In the beginning, there was the raw declaration of I AM and it was so powerful it consumed everything in its wake.

But the ego-self, puffed up like a sacred balloon, floats high above the muck of actual human connection, believing it is the sun around which all other planets must orbit.

From a nondual perspective, narcissism could be seen as love that has forgotten its own TRUE reflection. ..

It is divine consciousness trying to know its own infinity through the tiny straw of the small self, getting trapped in a hall of mirrors. The narcissist feels a cosmic truth that they are the universe experiencing itself

You only have to look at Trump! they mistake the individual wave for the entire ocean. They taste their own godliness and assume they are the only ones who received the memo.

Holding the tension of opposites is key for our evolution

I am special - I am no one.

I am relevant- I am so irrelevant

I am everything- I am nothing

Is this our only chance to move beyond all polarities and our only selfish arrogant little selves ?? The stepping stone isn’t something we cross; it dissolves beneath our feet.

One moment you are standing on the hard rock of “I am special,” hoarding your gifts and protecting your brand, and the next you are drowning in the recognition that everything is special.

Specialness itself is the baseline frequency of existence, The leap isn’t a leap at all it’s a falling through. And it feels like free fall. And so it should.

And I’m sorry to say there s no ground to land on.

It’s a free fall not so many humans are called to transverse . But a lot have no idea how…because i feel the elders are missing…

It’s a bone-deep remembering that the very power you thought was yours alone is the exact same power breathing through every blade of grass, every stranger’s heavy sigh, and every quantum particle dancing in the void.

The ancient myth whispers its warning across millennia: Narcissus, transfixed by his own image, wastes away in perpetual longing for what can never be possessed from the outside.

He mistakes the surface shimmer for the depth, the mirage of separation for the truth of interconnection. It is SO tempting to fall in that, fulfilling childhood wounds of unfulfilled lives of ancestors before us.

But resist we must .

entire cultures caught in this exact same trance scrolling through curated selves, optimizing our own bodies for what?

Whose benefit ??? What s the impact on our EARTH extracting energy from HER body- OUR BODY!!!!

Our collective soul withers in isolation it makes me wanna scream ;

But instead I turn the fire into Inquiry for ME and US HERE :

could ever this narcissistic hunger we carry transforms into a mystic’s compassion? .

The ego’s frantic demand to be seen and worshipped

recognised could it ever becomes the soul’s recognition that it is the seeing itself??

I dont know … I was watching a couple the other day sharing their pregnancy journey on tik tok million of followers MILLIONS….

What did we use to do BEFORE we watch everyone else’s life ?!

How long do you live without the distraction of your phone in your pockets ?

I experimented the other day… moving around and going to places without it. My attention returned BACK!!!! Fuller, richer, thicker, like the true buddha nature that i am.

Wow!!! I have been GROOMED and PREY of a NASTY Insidious Regime that sought to absorb me whole… my vision was right. For me and for us…

And it didn’t stop there but it’s all i ll share for now.

Crossing the Threshold

Crossing this threshold isn’t for all.

Some of us though will feel the call ringing deep inside our ribs

The call will feel so alive and hot that it ll be too hard to ignore.

Some of us may have been gifted visions ( myself included ) that will KILL them to break them…

I want to connect with those ones.

The midwives of the new.

In particular I’m interested to connect with those who want to find OTHER ways outside of capitalistic systems

Could we ?! There comes a moment where the old way of being reveals itself as entirely insufficient…

Those souls have felt that their hard-won individual consciousness,

carefully crafted sense of self, and personal spiritual attainments become a golden cage separating them from the greater becoming that wants to move through us.

And they only want to step deeper into becoming obsolete

Yet FREE in their sovereign expression.

I want to gather those ones around me

This is the threshold I want to tend the first friction between being and becoming

What does the world need from me ?!

I’m realising I firstly need people in similar place to myself …

A circle to keep accountable to this fire 🔥 so it doesn’t get contaminated with greedy egoic consciousness

Is this you??? Message me if so… I m gathering emails and addresses as ( commanded in another Vision….that I’m now left to obey…but for what I dont yet know…my visions were here since childhood so now im called to honour this visionary gene in me…)…

Some of us will carry a particular burden: we are the bridge-builders

We have tasted the nectar of nondual awareness, yet we feel the gravitational pull back into collective engagement.

We cannot rest in isolated personal bliss while the world suffers, nor can we lose ourselves in frantic activism without the compass of deeper knowing.

Our role is to become living demonstrations of what it looks like to be both fully awake and fully engaged deeply rooted in absolute truth, yet skillfully active in the messy world of form.

This isn’t about being gurus in the old, hierarchical sense. It is about becoming so useful, so transparent, and so aligned with what wants to emerge that the old paradigms of competition, armor, and cleverness simply dissolve.

If this is you get in touch

I d love to meet you ❤️

If this resonated or spoke into your heart let me know - send me your email… and number away from the void of screen…

I mean we have built whole religions around it !

I’m struck to know that humility comes with a watery prayer inside my lungs. This is what earnest prayer is for me. And it’s the ONLY prayer I’m interested in. Surrender breaks like a wave in my inner shore… then the wave surrendered in humble grace upon the shore’s embrace.

I’m still learning the language of prayer - as someone who have kept the fire of inquiry alive in my heart .No one taught me how to pray. It is a word i never had many associations with. On reflection perhaps this keeps it fresh and alive, but alien all the way.

No one told me that praying means reciprocity. I am learning this through life.

No one told me that praying means learning to speak the language of humility ; after allowing oneself to be cracked open - palms unfurled -to divine intelligence .

When prayer gets answered we know it -

There is an echo of a distant song that sounds so familiar as if you always sang it. It is our “eternal song” as beloved Rashani Rea, talks about.

This was what the moment felt like today before my facilitation of my

Ancient Mother Spiral Group of Mothers / Women.

Just as I opened sacred space - and felt my watery prayer arrive - a landmark for me that my prayer is heard ; Im not used to be doing this. I mean “opening sacred space” itself feels like a notion and concept that can invite performaty . I always rejected it… and my rejection held fire of intelligence. Now it arrived but as an organic evolution of my inner journey, out of surrender and not precodnitioned beliefs.

Just as my body lapsed into the hands of the divine,

a bumble bee entered my room…. I haven’t yet seen one in my home just yet.

She was so chubby , gorgeous looking , flirting with my window…

I lost sight of her at some point.

Silence.

No more buzzing of those majestic wings.

I looked behind the long line of books I have on my window sill and there she was.

Immersed or better entangled in a deep encounter with the spider web- her buzzing slowed -

thick with reverence ; her movements begun to slow too-

Her innate intelligence knew that this is a time of conscious unconscious disentangling …

The web had curled around her tiny legs - filling them up with this silky fragrance of the flavor, descend holds.

There was no escaping now.

No more buzzing.

Nor busying .

There was only this…

I stood there watching her how diligently she would unstuck her legs from particles of web along her tiny movements .

Lifting one up, then down again.

I became one with her … she became my mirror my teacher - I saw me in her … her tenacity to walk through the thick web of engulfment entrapment , the necessary stoppage that’s bestowed upon us by Grace- only as ignorant forgetful humans - we so so easily forget to say thank you. The ultimate act of Reciprocity.

Our only prayer.

To reach the Ancient Mother, we must first be caught by the truth of our entanglement.

We cannot fly over the pain; we have to feel the stickiness of it.

She didn’t stop moving …

But her movements took a whole other dimension- resisting still being fully consumed IS the ingredient key to : Descend Rite of Passage in the Ancient Mother Spiral.

A beautiful synchronicity was the BDescend to the DArk Mother was the Rite of Passage we were about to explore- she arrived as a teacher and I had to give over to her -minutes before the group,and weave her medicine in the process.

The void - eternity - may well consume us if we let it- our fight, our resistance , our moving of hands and legs is necessary for survival.

This is our sacred rebellion to claim our own space- the fierce mother in us waking up the lions to say “I will not be consumed” …

Stood there : I pondered if I was meant to rescue her or not : I couldn’t of course resist so I grabbed a book 📖 and offered her a bridge…. Inwardly staying suspended in time whether she ll accept it or not…

She graciously received the help. I felt my body sigh with relief ; the same relief I too breathe when help arrives and I’m learning to give over to the soft lending.

She glued her tiny legs on the bottom corner of the book and took flight …. It felt like a friendship of eternity arrived only to be cherished in the sweetest goodbye.

Reciprocity is this eternal dance of loving so hard that our hearts expand and contract upon each encounter - that our prayer of thank you reaches so deep that on departure what we are holding onto is the love we opened us in. The love we allowed in. This must be grief’s medicine. Love’s arch.

As she was in the air against the vast canvas of the blue sky, there was a distinct greyness I could discern from where I stood , welled up, gazing her flight …

A ball of fluffiness…

A distinct piece of silky web still attached to her feet…

A grey fluff of innocence …

tears came to my eyes …

We have associated that healing comes with the purification and cleansing ;

the total healing of our past and worlds . As if we are toxins to be cleansed . As if broken vessels to be made holy.

But I felt the Mother’s voice again ring so deeply true;

That our flying while carrying the essence of our truth of our journeys IS our medicine we carry to the world.

Not the flight but the web still attached to our legs … The medicine of our story and history… our pain our grief our innermost perfect impeccable humannes..

Of course the bee holds particular significance for me as a descendand of the Minoan Bee Priestesses in Ancient Crete. The taste of Nectar in my throat is one of my core tangible breadcrumbs leading me there. I m sceptic. Scientist. I resist and my resistance holds sacred power

this isnt about commodification of the deep ancient wisdom we carry. My resistance holds my deep bow and respect to HER. to the Divine.

https://www.donnagerrard.com/blog/2022/7/13/priestess-of-the-bee

The Invitation: Meeting the Weaver Prompts for your journaling.

I dont journal any more; life is my blank canvas and me her pen…but it was helpful for a while.

• 

  Image created through help of a friend who volunteeerd to support my work via AI…

• What is the ‘spider web’ currently holding your feet? Is it a cultural expectation (the ‘perfect’ mother), a personal habit (people-pleasing), or the collective despair for the world?

• Become Bee: she used her hands and legs : inviting us to ponder too: Where in your physical body do you feel the urge to ‘push back’ or fight for your own life? Is it in your throat, your hands, your gut?

• The bee accepted a little help from a witness (me) . Who or what is the ‘hand’ helping you untangle right now? Are you allowing yourself to be helped, or are you trying to fight the web entirely alone?

If you took flight today , even a few meters afar, what ‘piece of the web’ would still be stuck to your feet? Instead of seeing it as a failure to be ‘clean,’ can you see that scrap of web as a badge of wisdom? What does that piece of the trap teach you about how to fly differently now?

In our descend we are stripped of easy yes - stripped of our busy-ness and our easy flights… But what does it or can it gift us?

If this blog touched you share comment like, it means a world to me!

Cretan Retreat 1-6 October 2026: 2 places left to make this magic happen!

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com/retreat-mothers-greece-crete-2026

The Stillness in the Spiral Group process on 12th July in Hyde UK :

in the tremor at the core of

Your mother’s Utero.

The sacred thrumming of life shaking the bedrock of comfort

Reveals  itself as Creation’s Richter.

To grasp HER truth is to shudder like a Rizla sheet

Against the wind’s ineffable vastness.

This is Source whispering:

Do not set.

Remain formless in the dawning of your humanness.

Words Maria kefalogianni

Today I recalled my first birth with my first home born child .a wonderful story I’ll enter another time . At some point during my labour I became aware of the thought

“ wow birth is amazing”

While in a deeply transcendental space I was bearing witness of the magnificence of my uterus tremoring to bring my baby boy down. Effortless Grace. Not my doing . Simply nature doing her thing through ME???!!! What miracle

I recall thinking

“ wow my uterus / body is a miracle it pulses on its own to birth my baby “

I felt deeply in my marrow the potency of my instinctual mama power ! The power centre all women touch, and ARE but that we quickly FORGET.

My first birth and maternity leave was a first glimpse of what I now call and recognise in my body of work the Melicardia- the Honeyed Heart. ❤️

A first human glimpse of the Deep Heart as it’s known in contemplative traditions , a term coined by Pendergast John.

I was SO high for my whole maternity leave - I FUSED with him. I felt in heaven.

I loved each and every moment on my first birth experience .

my journey shifted post that first birth. To a deep dark night of the soul with my second birth.

I kept the Inquiry close

Why have you gifted me such dramatically different experiences ?

holding that inquiry close and listening revealed to me the why. Because the high s always by default followed by descend .

But I really wanted to come on in and

Share with you all my below insights landing in me the moment I heard the word TREMOR.

I never heard it’s sacred sound until that moment .

These insights will be forming part of my evolving body of work THE ANCIENT MOTHER SPIRAL and the forever taking book I have begun!! Mothering 3 kids and no village is the FUEL for my HOLY RAGE and offering all that I do.

So here is what landed see if this resonates in your heart - let me know how , comment or share I always love hearing from the global village we all belong!

1. 💫 We strive for linearity when the breaking of our comfort births us

2. 💫 TREMORING (with Grace) is the essence of our Rebirth on a soul level

3. 💫 A baby comes down a birth canal : our Soul travels down what I call Soul Canal

4. 💫 Descend is essential part of LIFE itself

5. 💫 We are born like a trembling leaf and yet we seek solidity .

6. 💫 our Mother’s Uterus expands and contracts to BRING CREATION and YET we are afraid of our inner psychological contractions! What Innocent ignorant humans we are ! Without them we wouldn’t be HERE!

🌟 It is TIME to RECLAIM the word MOTHER for what it truly MEANS! 🌟

I do not mean it as a gendered Role. The role of Mother I recall when it begun burning thinning@ I cannnot possibly be a mother without being a mother ? It was incomprehensible

Inconceivable

I’ll be weaving my body of work in our Retreat in CRETE and I can NOT wait

We are calling in a small group of Mother and Women to co weave together abundance and reflect on how we can move as a WE.

Share comment tags mother woman who may be keen to join us!

🌟 3 weeks left for 4 women to say YES SPLIT DEPOSIT NOW OPEN - INQUIRE FOR MORE 🌟

Image created through my writing on NotebookKLM via a friend’s help and guidance

It s hard to resist the help that arrives by Life

OFFERINGS

💫 Crete

I Retreat for MOTHERS and WOMEN

If this post resonated inspired you I welcome your acknowledgment of this inspiration

Making explicit all of the ways in which are interconnected to each other makes like become by default a reciprocity

Why that s important ? Because it keeps our greed for personal recognition at bay

It humbles us into receiving wisdom from the tiniest particle of life

It weaves and ck weaves Indra’s web our New Earth 🌍

All my love

As always

There is a lingerie that can not be worn

A distillation

that intoxicates

the wildest strangers-

An unending peak

that shreds my half dressed truths

With bear animal hands

leaving me dazzled ,

drunk

on what I can no longer swallow

Slow drip syrup fills

the crevices of my soul

still thirsty,

still undrinking

A mesmerizing

Liqueur

liquifying time

in a crystal glass

I raise a toast

To this undoing

as

I am being Sipped

In the wetness of the cosmos

all that remains

~ this open throat

A euphoric visitation

I can not quiet grasp

Yet i intimately know

My spine draws loops

Of eternity through

the marrow of my being.

The toast raises itself

The glass tips

And  I,

am the spilling

words Maria kefalogianni

The mystery dances us in exactly this: mysterious way if we stay free falling ,

Into the eternal gap that is our here and now.

Sometimes it sends us talismans - like the dress above - a post which I had written about in earlier writings…

And after a call IM READY. I said. My YES. A whole embodied quiet YES.

“ the dress of your initiation”, spirit said, unbeknown to me that I was to withstand enormous heat in the months to come which would birth my body of work!

THE ANCIENT MOTHER SPIRAL

It got me thinking how often we respond to life or how often we dialogue openly with life from within! Our YES carries weight. There s a reason humans have struggled for it for millennia. A TRUE YES, to spirit, carries light energy strong enough to consume us WHOLE.

So respect your fears , your resistance, your guarding against sth …

Having said that I feel grief for humanity.

where has our DIALOGUE gone?

Where has our scared imagination disappeared ?

The innocence play like curiosity that knows no bounds , truly!

My writing feels dried up, but the truth is I’m channeling my creative fire in my children and family and I’m basking in the inner silence below radar lately, after a 9 month descend to soul and unity consciousness.

My husband is in the surgery room today and I’m home with the kids.

I accessed again the liminal. And exhaustion. That sweet altar spot .

And I found how much depth I have carved in me to remain present open accessible , as much as that is possible.

it also brought a tint of the holy rage that erupted back in my 9 month descend, “where the FUCK is the village for us mothers when we need it ‘?!”

I caught a though pass through.

crazy capitalist has jailed our hearts and minds into a forever chase - of WHAT?!

I long to leave the grey cement of the city

Though I have found refuge here , true home and belonging inside myself

Amidst the cement

The dead zombies

The deadly passivity of this land-

I found corners of beauty aliveness ,

But something has now begun stirring again.

My heart longs to travel and explore the world 🌍 as an adventure.

And I m listening to Grace s whispers as the whole re arranging of my household is continuing in its energies of masculine and feminine.

health challenges bring us to our knees in surrender , if we choose it. And our hearts become a bit more like playdoh…

THE RETRIEVE

Well it will be a stunning initiation for the GROUP of women I’m calling in, who will join us in our Retreat in Crete where the DRESS 👗 will be worn, but also ceremonially

Invoked in each and every woman,

For HER Euphoric Body

HER aliveness

HER eroticism

HER sensuality

We re offering 20% Discount to our Substack subscribers - limited places we need 4 women to say YES and to make it happen !

Pictures from our venue

And info on our retreat for you to fill in ,

ASK us any questions you may have

10 years ago these words came out of my mouth “ Psychotherapy will Dillute in time”.

We re here.

it’s time to expand our notion of Self and keep nurturing this dimension in us that offers true transformation.

I have a name for this and I call it the Ancient Mother Within. Contemplative traditions call it the Buddha self - Jung called it Self with capital “S”.

I left my homeland Crete 17 years ago to “find myself” and I now return with my Medicine- our collective medicine perhaps .

This is a DIRECT INVITATION TO YOU beloved Reader

I am thrilled to announce that bookings are now open for our upcoming and so needed for MOTHERS and WOMEN break! we will weave my body of work th Ancient Mother Spiral - to abide in that place of unconditional love

**Cretan Retreat** this October. This isn't just a "break" we don’t call it Retreat as it’s not the usual escape but RETRIEVE ***

it is our life’s mission to support mothers and women reclaim the parts of themselves they have set aside in service of others.

Why This, Why Now?

Motherhood is a beautiful burden, but it can also be a place where we lose our own names. Our ow essence and our own light. Our soul. Colonialism has placed the Mother at the bottom of the pile.

We re bringing HER back in the Centre!

We created this space for the woman and Mother who:

* Is tired of justifying her existence beyond being "mum".

* Feels the exhaustion of holding the family's "delicate ecosystem" together.

* Wants to remember the wild, creative force she was before she became everyone else's everything.

The Offering (October 1–6, 2026) 🗓️

This is a journey into the rugged, untamed heart of Preveli, Crete the land that has honored the Great Mother for millennia.

Check our River next to US!!!

🫒 Authentic Nourishment 🫒

🎁 Traditional Cretan meals cooked by our own Mothers and family-made wine

(Oh YES my uncle’s!)

🎁 Deep Healing:Led by two experienced psychotherapists using presence-centered tools, somatic inquiry, and ancestral healing.

🎁 Wild Exploration: Walking journeys through gorges, river waterfall immersions, and drumming circles on the beach.

🎁 we will open space for max 11 women to ensure deep, attuned circles and personal transformations.

Your Investment 🎁

* All-Inclusive:* Includes 5 nights of accommodation, all meals, and drinks.

*Exclusive Gifts:** Free pamper/spa gifts and local family wine included.

* Flexible Support: We offer tiered payment plans to make this accessible.

A Call to Action & A Note on Letting Go*🌊

We need **4-5 women** to secure their places via deposit by the **end of May** to make this retreat a reality.

If the numbers aren't meant to be, we will release this back to the "great river of life" and let go.

If your heart is calling you to land with us, don't wait. Let’s co-create a world where joy is a political act.

Ready to lean in:

📩 Email spiral to claim your discount! maria.kefalogianni@gmail.com

🔗 Register your interest or secure your deposit at the links below.

With love,

*Maria & Anna*

*The Ancient Mother Spiral*

Tag or share 🙏to another woman

Let s allow this to ripple far and wide

HOW to proceed

Our venue

https://terrapreveli.com

More info ⬇️ on our Days- ASK any question you may have

https://www.presencecenteredpsychotherapy.com

To Book your deposit here INBOX me SPIRAL to claim your discount!

https://buy.stripe.com/fZu5kC82pg78f5cf2F57W00

A mother,

falls into the abyss of love the way galaxies collide.

It isn’t gentle nor a planned descent.

💫 💫 It is violent beauty 💫 💫

A Mother’s heart can expand faster

than light

Isn't this how the universe breathes ?

Through the destruction and grinding of worlds ,

worlds that won't fit the blueprints they handed us to mould in,

in sterile waiting rooms and limited dogmas ?

This friction burns.

This descent - frees us.

A mother , witnesses

her child navigate between what he is and what they need him to be.

She feels the acid of unspoken ghosts on her own skin. She is porous

External expectations

are sharp-

weighted scalpels cutting through every artery , every soft pallette within her ,

seeking to choke the wild indigenous rhythm of her erratically harmonised pulse.

Our kids live in classrooms thick with manufactured silence and we call this harmony ?

Institutions have become a cacophony of swallowed screams-

A symphony of severed tongues.

What lies

what poison have we been fed!

To believe that our rawest most tender spots are the ones to bandage

To hide,

To apologize for

Instead , I advocate of letting them breathe, as they are ,

Wide open wounds

weeping galaxies

We are being threatened to become small

Shrunk hallelujias

Chanted in

outcast churches.

But what we , mothers ,

learn to UN- become

Is Andromedas, free falling in the Milky Way.

The truth of the matter is ,

Our hearts are here to expand across the horizons ,

until we become black holes swallowing our own luminescence .

It is only then ,

Our own vulnerability becomes the very hydrogen that

births SUNS (S.o.n.s) .

Isn’t it how the Universe expands ?

Theough this friction of letting our ribs crack wide open

under the regime of loving too much ,

in a world that pushes to sanitise tenderness.

It’s what we’ re here to do.

To outdate the expired constellations in our bloodstream ,

retrieve the ancient pulsation of their oxygen , and resuscitate generations to come.

Until our collision is remembered as

HOLY

by those nonbelievers .

Until our new Earth arrives

Under our own bare feet.

********

I was reminded of a Poem of mine this morning during my own Descend to the Dark ; when we have enough consciousness to descend willingly to the depths - the fire of this new Mother Consciousness transforms into creative Fire 🔥

*****

Each Easter, growing up, my favorite movie was Jesus from Nazaret. It was my little innocent ways to connect with the Divine. I loved weeping in recognition of an ancient ache I couldn’t yet name. I would watch it on repeat.

As if my soul needed the repeating of the suffering

As if she needed to taste the miracle of the joy birth-

as if to whisper “lest you forget who you are”

The weight of Grief and the Light of Grace: The alchemy of the Cross.

I originate from Crete. The land of the Minoans. Cretan history is defined by layers of occupation and resistance (Minoan, Roman, Byzantine, Venetian, Ottoman, Nazi).

There is a unique Cretan intensity to Good Friday. In many villages, an effigy of Judas is burned, but there is also a deep, silent reverence for the “forgotten dead. The community comes together, lamenting . Everyone is dressed in black, ( not unlike how most of my people are dressed most days).

My village is a greek orthodox small village in the central west Crete - called Anogia.

My family would visit the village every Easter. I grew up a little further outside of Anogia.

Easter meant, big family gatherings- long tables brimming with home-made food , home made wine- plenty of story telling. Stories of grief - stories of humour.

I would hang off the lips of my uncles in those times. When all other kids would play ,I would prefer to be the receiver of those stories. A hunghry part of my soul needed to hear them. To imagine what was it like. Perhaps, an ancient part of me, too, remembered.

On Good Friday the whole village would walk the epitafios, in an enacting parade of communal grieving.

The little church opposite my grandmother’s house.

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We would wake up early on a Friday, and go to the local church to help with the decorations. Below, is one from the church opposite my grandmother’s house. Once decorating would complete I would then go back home to get dressed and return to church to listen to the nun’s chanting the hymns.

There was something about the repetition of the song,

the vibration before the words,,,,it was a place in which my mind would find quiet, and unbeknown to me, it was these moments

I would walk the pilgrimage from my head to my heart.

( Egomia- lamenting ritual for Christ).

I was about 8 when i first wore black clothes and became a “mirofora” ( originating from myrrh, a girl alongside other girls called to sing the lamentations songs for Christ’s Death. Today, after 32 years in the so called future, I am fusing with this girl and Mother Mary in some fashion of timeless beauty.

When I close my eyes, I am transported back in Crete. I can feel the black fabric of my dress, my skinny legs wondering if they will get cold during the wander around the village. Back then, the grief of the world didn’t feel like a story in a book; it felt like my own skin. I

I recall the heavy, rhythmic tolling of the bells- the penthimo- vibrating in my chest, a frequency that told me the innocence of the world was breaking, and I was breaking with it.

Even then, my heart was so wide open like an absorbing sponge for the “lost innocence,” giving itself over to the love for Christ that felt more like a wild, holy ache than a religious duty. I loved doing the chanting, but I held embarrassment to say how much I was enjoying it when most girls seemed to do it as a chore.

In the church, I always found my connection to the Divine. My family ,especially my Mother was very close to Jesus, and a practising woman but I was truly deeply blessed to never had any of this religion conditioning imposed on me.

My father , not so much of a religious man, and yet a deeply humble spiritual being, would tell me “the church is here, pointing to the heart. Heaven and hell is here Maria”

Being abroad for over 17 years now, I have nurtured a blessed friction between belonging and becoming. Immigration forces one to dis-root so they re-root back in the heart of being.

I love my island. But i got consumed and swallowed there.

I absorbed so much from the world around me, wounds that i didnt have the capacity to tend, or even name at the time. Patriarchical messages …

My wild firey spirit couldn’t be contained in the walls of Crete. I was wild.

I left home in 3 days at the age of 21. I now feel no need to return as I have homed inside of me all exiled parts. My church is here. No Worshipping of a God, other than the Mystery itself, often presenting itself to me as a Feminine Goddess, at other times as an Invisible Lover. Holy Union is Here. and it is the anointing Humanity longs to taste.

Last year ,I was in a deep ache of a radical undoing - where the fierce divine feminine fire erupted in my psyche to bring a deeper equilibrium of all I now am, and birth my body of work. One evening, I sat around my altar and had a deeply mystical experience fusing with Mary. “Mother” is not just a figure in a cathedral, but an active, breathing force within us.

I offer my poem as a voice of rebellion - when all religion focuses on Jesus, I always felt the ache and pain of Mary. That evening and amidst my wild descend to Soul I became ONE with Mary. The war in Gaza was soaring , and still is, and my heart was filled with Grief for all Mothers losing their children. There is NO difference.

PIETA- Mystical Union.

Sat in my altar

Legs folded

Head bowed

I break into a fierce rain

Water runs down my earthly cheeks.

I lay your body on mine,

your bleeding head rests on my lap,

tormented by the hands of oblivion.

my mother heart Screams.

This ancestral agony

that tears my ribs apart,

Sirens of howling memories

Run through the passage of time.

I wash your wounds

Fingers rubbed in milk and honey .

I breathe frankincense into your tangled hair

lighting candles in your honor

White for forgiveness,

Gold for the resurrection blooming Inside your broken ribs.

I m feeling that my heart

Is expanding

and rupturing

and expanding,

filling with this ancient Gnosis of bliss.

I grow taller and taller

Higher than the mountains

that hold the quake of the earth crumbling.

I’m finally here

Kneeling before our crucified humanity

Whispering the secrets of fierce hope

To those who see without eyes

To those who listen without ears,

Benediction

I marvel at your thorns and bless them

For, those who hurt you

My child of god,

Are also crucified

On a forgotten cross

No one held for them.

I now weave crowns of lavender

To replace what pierced your brow

Gather your tears in alabaster jars

Each drop a seed of forgiveness

I Plant them deep into the earth,

I wrap you in cloth woven from starlight

Sing you hymns older than sorrow

Rocking you like a tide that knows

That the moon is pulling her home

I’m gifted the vision:

We’re resurrecting now Dear human

Hold my hand, that passes the aloe in your deepest cuts

Those invisible ones -you don’t dare show

let me hold you like candlelit prayer

Here;

in the embrace of the one

That holds the deep gnosis:

that our freedom

lies In the marrying

of the axis Of this ancient remembrance.

Rise now beloved,

Carry my love as your armor

My tears as your blessing

My heart as your compass

March all the way back

to the light you forgot

That you are.

We will never bring an END to patriarchy with another form of war against patriarchy.

How deeply can we love the unlovable ?

Where is the line between accepting the forgotten , exiled human behind the cruelty of their behavior but holding a fierce NO to the energy that consumes.

How many of us have been forgotten on neglected crosses. How often we forget to tend to our crucifying cuts. To apply the aloe of our soul’s medicine.

Most of us have forgotten the Ancient Mother inside our ribs- we had colonised all notions of love and in our instinctual hungry pursuit for LOVE we have externalised it all in idols, icons and dualistic maps.

Whilst the young black dressed girl would feel the grief and in her small ways still be caught up with a patriarchal image of a distant God , I have moved beyond this and have found and be found the Indwelling Feminine.

By allowing our hair to be washing the wounds with milk and honey, we are reparenting the world. We can allow ourselves to be finally ‘here’—grounded in our own mountain animal body.

The Conscious MOTHER as Woodman Marion would say. The Honeyed Heart in us that knows no division, as the Ancient Mother Spiral , echoes.

THE ANCIENT MOTHER SPIRAL

The Ancient Mother Spiral is the bridge between my Cretan roots and the cosmic expansion I experienced at the altar of my cosmic heart. It represents a journey that is never linear, but always deepening- a path where the young ones in us are not left behind, but are instead carried into the heart of the Mother archetype.

The STILL Point of the centre of the Spiral.

The place where dualities dissolve like candle wax and what s left is purely the very organ that was first created . Our divine Heart : pulsating with the galactic umbilical cord that unites us with the Uterus of existence.

For ever

And ever

And ever

In gratitude and Love as always

MY 3 INVITATIONS TO YOU

• JOIN THE SPIRAL – BEGINS APRIL 20th for 6 weeks online. Affordable and Inclusive. Do not Undervalue this. New paradigms do not need to ask THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE. We gotta learn THAT Giving matters

• A FREE taster of the Spiral Series for you to taste a glimpse and come in presence together. Our Next one is 19th April.

• my FIRST Ever Retreat back in my homeland CRETE. Filling the form you will be opening you to special offers and Discounts we will soon be announcing, only to those who express direct interest via the form. The Spiral will touch and be carved like hieroglyphic on Cretan Sandy beach. It is a shivering Joy.

• Join my Facebook AMS community

Looking forward to connecting with you in Real time,

Subscribe now

Marion Woodman spoke of the "Glass Coffin" a frozen state of the "Good Mother" archetype where we remain visible but untouchable, "perfect" but breathless. We strive for perfection over our own oxygen.

For those in the healing arts, and therapyfields this pressure is perhaps doubled. Well, it was for me?

We hold the container for the world’s suffering, yet we return home to a one-way street of maternal sacrifice. We feel split.

We feel the "leaking" of our life force. The reason for this is truly simple.

It’s because we re yet to do a little bit more love. More whole-ing.

I recall a colleague at the start of my career telling me therapy and life should feel one. For how long I felt like I was performing.

Don’t get me wrong , I d always love to sit with my clients and listen to their soul. It’s the most humbling thing .

But even then , ever so subtly , even having trained to a truly non pathologising approach: the person centred approach ; I was hoarding a subtle inner belief that

“My clients need healing”.

This was an extension of my own relationship to healing and my tendencies to FLEE myself.

It was ONLY through the unschooling of becoming a mother I broke wide open to what true true love and healing actually meant. It was through THIS portal my books and knowledge burnt to ashes. And all it remained was one long continous undoing through sacred surrender.

I have and continue to survive mothering WHILST mothering my soul’s inner fire through my wild inner indigenous woman and mind. Through NOT losing sight of awe and the sacred art of slowing down . Or sometimes at the brink of exhaustion my fingers have to type crazy blogs - like now nearing midnight!- don’t ask me why. It s

food for my soul.

The Biological Debt of the "Disappearing Mother"

Jung famously noted that the greatest burden a child bears is the unlived life of the parent. Modern science now backstops this: Intergenerational Epigenetics shows that trauma and behavioral patterns aren't just "taught"; they are chemically signaled.

When a mother "disappears" into her role, her chronic self-suppression registers as a stress signature in the home environment. Research into Mirror Neurons suggests that children don't just do what we do; they feel what we feel.

If we operate from a hollowed-out "Persona," our children mirror that lack of vitality. Your self-abandonment becomes their blueprint for survival.

If we operate from ANY role - we suffocate our wild life force.

I know this sounds a bit woo hoo and airy fairy … but it’s true. What we are is more watery than water .

the very waters our birthing form is created …. Which brings me to another concept in my body of work ….

Building the Somatic Placenta

In the Ancient Mother Spiral (AMS),

we move beyond the surface-level fixes of "self-care." We work on building what I call the Somatic Placenta. The dimension in you that holds True Life!

From a Polyvagal perspective, thi is the capacity to widen your "Window of Tolerance." It is the slow deepening of the nervous system to hold the "heat" of life’s complexity without shattering. But it s not limited to simple trauma informed practice . It is infused by SOUL.

• The Goal: To move from the "Glass Coffin" (Functional Freeze/Dorsal Vagal shutdown) into a state of Ventral Vagal Connection—where you are safe enough in your own body to be wild, creative, and real.

And for this we must Re learn the muscles that help us GIVE and RECEIVE with WHOLE of LIFE!!!

Have you ever slowed down to receive how the sun kisses you?

How the bloomed rose greets you on the street an enchanted good morning ?

I always pause and stop to talk to my flowers when I’m with my kids. My crazy auntie, we used to call her would daily converse with her plants!

LIFE IS RECIPROCITY

Why stop it at our mothering journey?

The Developmental Gift of Reciprocity

We’ve been trained to believe that asking for anything back is "selfish." However, neurobiology tells a different story. When I began asking my sons for a head stroke or a moment of silence, I wasn't just "taking." I was providing a Developmentally significant Rite of Passage.

Teaching a child reciprocity builds the neural pathways for empathy and social attunement. If we don’t model how to receive care, we raise humans who don't know how to give it.

“Mum I’ll take this log home”

“Have you asked mama Earth if it’s ok to take it ? Go inside yourself and check please darling”

“Mum- she said it’s ok”

I have being consciously instilling them this since they are 2!!

The very essence that births us here is the essence I want them to Respect.

The very consciousness that birthed them here - is the very consciousness I wish to instill.

AWE- RESPECT for LIFE- MYSTERY- WILD IMAGINATION.

So ask your children - what they d like to offer you back…. Allow yourself to receive their gesture of love and care.

Your Totality is Their Safety. The more you "Gift You," the more of your regulated, vibrant nervous system they—and your clients—actually receive.

Join the Cauldron: The Ancient Mother Spiral

It is time to reclaim the wild one you are. It is not a painless journey, but it is a necessary "whol-ing." Join us to stir the medicinal potion in the company of other sisters.

Ancient Mother Spiral Series (Free Gathering): 19th April is our next one

For my

Full Mother Woman Alchemy Group

We Start: 20th April (Mondays)

Time: 3:00 PM – 4:30 PM UK Time

We will be weaving archetypal wisdom story telling (my stories ), myth , soul infused poetry and sisterhood sharing circle ⭕️

A few places left

Book below